Mission

Love did not come easily to me. 

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I did not attract romantic attention, or I attracted unwanted attention. When I started "officially" dating, I experienced what I felt like failure over and over. I never felt truly seen, heard, or wanted in partnership. I did not receive the commitment I so desperately wanted, or I rejected dates who offered it quickly.

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I did not believe I was physically attractive, or interesting, or funny enough for true love. I did not believe I was worthy of the kind of man and love I really wanted to experience.

 

Unsurprisingly, dating brought me many flavors of pain and heartbreak. 

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Each time I thought I had broken the cycle and found real romance, I was proven wrong again; inevitably I would be left, down and discouraged, if not flat out depressed.

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Finally, a man said the golden words: he wanted to marry me.

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We were just friends, but he was one of my best friends at the time and I was deeply, madly in love with him. I believed 100% in the commitment he promised... until 3 months later when he began to systematically break my spirit and heart.

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Not knowing whether I could live without him, but knowing I couldn't spend my life with someone so willing to crush me verbally, I slowly and painfully detached myself from him and the future I had envisioned with him.

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Once again, I felt reminded that I was not meant for love.

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I spent several years recovering from the attachment, picking up the pieces of my heart, and reconciling myself to a life without relationship, nuclear family, or children - a future I wanted.

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At just the right moment, I was asked out by a man who was interested in me intellectually, though not especially romantically or sexually. Still, we had a connection, and I accepted this as the best I could do.

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Through him, I was introduced to the study of tantra, which got me tumbling down a rabbit hole of relationship psychology, attraction science, and intimacy healing.

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I discovered that the answers I had been seeking were out there, I just hadn't known which questions to ask.

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I began to apply my studies to my dating life - and immediately my results changed. 

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It turned out I was interesting, fun, desirable, and even beautiful. Men liked dating me and wanted me to stick around. It felt like an overnight transformation from what I had known before.

 

I went from hopeless and disempowered in love to skilled and confident at creating connection and intimacy.

 

And, I found the relationship I was looking for - the Big Love that made me giddy and grounded me at the same time, the one that opened me up to deeper intimacy with my partner and connected me more profoundly to myself.

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The more I talked to others about my journey, the more stories I heard about others struggling with love, people who were disenchanted by modern dating, and people who felt love had run them ragged or like me, that it wasn't meant for them. All kinds of people, and so many, are struggling with intimate relationships. I knew I had to act and share what I had learned with the world.

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It has become my mission to empower people who crave relationship to create a love of their own - Big, Passionate, Intimate Love - especially if they feel undeserving or incapable of creating and keeping that love in their lives. 

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If I can do it, you can, too.

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